


Quirkish Shenanigans

by TheMissluluB



Series: Log Of Pesterlogs [7]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: As in Bethesda style clipping, Comedic body horror, Heirs being... well... Heirs., Inheriting your aspect is hard and no one but other heirs understand, M/M, Pesterlog(s) (Homestuck), Pre Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-04
Updated: 2018-03-04
Packaged: 2019-03-26 23:55:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13868700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMissluluB/pseuds/TheMissluluB
Summary: In which two socially inept heirs attempt to talk about their interests.They get very, very sidetracked.





	Quirkish Shenanigans

**Author's Note:**

> For Events in the Homestuck Writer's Discord - Quirk Week and Johnquius Week
> 
> And as an avid Johnquius shipper and an avid pesterlog writer this bullshit happened.
> 
> The "&" in this case means friendship!!!
> 
> (Title may be subject to changing)

\-- ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering centaursTesticle [CT]! --

EB: hey equius!  
CT: D --> Oh  
CT: D --> This is quite  
CT: D --> Une%pected  
CT: D --> What is it you require?  
EB: haha :p  
EB: i just wanna talk, silly.   
CT: D --> Oh  
CT: D --> What about?  
EB: well, what do you wanna talk about?  
CT: D -->   
CT: D --> John, you messaged _me_  
EB:   
EB: good point.  
EB: i dont think things out all the way.  
CT: D --> Oh  
CT: D --> Well   
CT: D --> I suppose we can talk about  
CT: D --> Uhm  
CT: D --> Our  
CT: D --> Interests?  
EB: that sounds like a good idea, actually!   
EB: considering i dont know that much about you.  
EB: ill start!   
EB: i like   
EB: ... wait, do you want all my interests?  
CT: D --> Do you want me to start  
EB: no!   
EB: ill start.  
EB: i started this trainwreck, ill fix it.  
CT: D --> Whatever you say, John  
EB: so. i like... movies?  
CT: D --> What kind of movies?  
EB: oh  
EB: aaaaall?  
CT: D --> ?  
EB: movies with like, you know  
EB: nic cage, and matthew mcconaughey, and all them movies.   
EB: con air used to be my favourite movie, but its so _cringy_ now.  
CT: D --> You still like it, don’t you  
EB:   
EB: _how did you know that_  
CT: D --> There’s such thing as a guilty pleasure  
EB: i guess its that, then.   
EB: anyway thats one of my interests. whats one of your interests?  
CT: D --> I  
CT: D --> Build things  
CT: D --> ?  
EB: like what?  
CT: D --> Robots, manely  
CT: D --> Mainly*  
CT: D --> Shoot  
EB: thats pretty cute.  
CT:  
CT: D --> I  
CT:  
CT: D --> I build robots for sparring, whenever it takes my fancy  
EB: wait, like a legit fully functioning robot?  
CT: D --> It has a very dumb AI I can’t seem to grasp a hold on developing fully, but yes  
CT: D --> It is a “Legit Robot”, as you put it  
EB: thats so cool   
CT: D --> Really?  
EB: yeah!!  
CT: D --> Oh  
CT: D --> Well  
CT: D --> I’m glad you think that  
EB: :B  
CT: D --> John  
CT: D --> May I a% you something personal?  
EB: uhh... sure?  
CT: D --> Why do humans not have quir%?  
EB: what do you mean?  
EB: why would that be personal?  
CT: D -->   
CT: D --> What  
CT: D --> Your quirk is something that’s individual to you  
CT: D --> In my opinion, it’s what makes you... well, _you_  
CT: D --> So seeing all the humans talking the same way is  
CT: D --> Well, it’s kind of weird  
EB: we dont _all_ talk the same way!  
EB: like, rose talks all like  
EB: Smart, and collected. Like she has everything together.   
EB: where as i type... well, the way i speak, really!  
EB: dave just types bullshit, honestly, but he never types ‘yall’.   
EB: it was hilarious when i first heard him say it.   
CT: D --> But John  
CT: D --> Dirk tal% in the same way as Rose, Jake, and Jane do  
CT: D --> And Roxy, Dave  
CT: D --> Albeit with more spelling mista%  
CT: D --> And you and Jade type similarly too  
EB: i mean... i guess?  
CT: D --> Whereas, those of trollish persuasion use quir% as identifiers  
CT: D --> As in, you w001d spot me if I were in a packed server due to my Bow and Arrow, and my use of the number 100 and %  
CT: D --> And you c001d differentiate myself from Horuss, who  
CT: D --> Though we have similar quir%, they’re also very different  
CT: D --> ...  
CT: D --> You won’t tell Horuss what I’m about to do, will you?  
EB: i dont really speak to horuss anyway, but i promise i wont!  
CT: D --> Okay, so  
CT: D --> I speak like this, and Horuss uses a similar quirk, but  
CT: D --> If I were to talk like Horuss, I w001d  
CT: 8=D < Start my sentences with the visage of a noble hoofbeast, instead of a bow and arrow. I w001d litter my sentences with a stampede of high spirited hoofbeast puns, and a%ually finish all my sentences with a foal stop, unlike Equius. I use 100/001’s and %’s like Equius w001d, hoofever you can still tell that this is Horuss that is speaking.   
CT: D --> ... Or can you?  
EB:   
EB: i see what you mean.  
CT: D --> Ugh, that felt awful to type out  
EB: oh?  
CT: D --> Quir% are personal  
CT: D --> Only the closest to you can type your quirk if you allow them too  
EB: :o  
CT: D --> “:o” indeed  
EB: so, if i were to type out something like “c001”, would you tell me to stop?  
CT: D -->   
CT: D --> D  
CT: D --> Do you want to do that?  
EB: i dunno, i mean.  
EB: i wouldnt if you said you didnt want me to.  
EB: which is why im asking you now!  
CT: D --> ...  
CT: D --> Are you copying my quirk, or are you attempting to make your own?  
EB: in this case id be copying you in a friendly friend way  
CT: D -->   
CT: D --> Maybe I’ll allow it if we become closer friends  
EB:   
EB: did you WANT me to make my own quirk???  
CT: D --> That is entirely your decision  
EB: ~~ so something like this?? ~~  
EB: (the “~~” is the wind :p)  
CT: D --> That is cute  
CT: D --> Quirk finding is fun, and quite a personal journey one has to go through  
CT: D --> It is weird to drop a quirk, and only done in the most serious of situations  
EB: :o !!  
EB: wait  
EB: 8o !!  
EB: no...  
CT: D --> “Bo” ?  
CT: D --> Due to your square glasses?  
EB: BD  
EB: ... i feel like im taking something from dave though  
EB: they look like shades  
EB: T.T  
CT: D --> That is the weirdest emoticon I have ever seen  
CT: D --> Maybe □.□ ?  
EB: pfff.  
CT: D --> One day you might get something that feels natural  
CT: D --> Unless humans don’t feel like that about words  
EB: i think its half and half honestly.  
EB: some people talk with an accent and it comes through in their writing purely by accident.  
EB: i think its safe to say words are just weird  
CT: D --> Very safe to say, in fact  
CT: D --> By  
EB: hahahahaha  
CT: D --> Did I do the face right  
EB: that looks like a sbahj face!  
CT: D --> I did it right  
CT: D --> Yes  
EB: yes!!  
CT: D --> Yes  
CT: D --> !  
EB: :D  
EB: i think ill look into this “quirk finding” :P  
EB: wait  
EB: 100k?  
CT:   
CT: D --> !  
CT: D --> John, you did my thing  
EB: sorry!!!  
CT: D --> No, it is ok, I did not mind in that case   
CT: D --> Tr001y  
CT: D --> I am alright with that  
EB: are you sure???  
CT: D --> 100% sure  
EB: that is a lot of sureness you have  
EB: but if you say so!  
CT: D --> W  
CT: D --> We sh001d  
CT: D --> Talk  
CT: D --> More often  
CT: D --> If you want  
EB: we should! fellow heir :p  
CT: D --> I  
CT: D --> Yes   
CT: D --> Fellow heir  
CT: D --> Bp  
CT: D --> No  
CT: D --> BP ?  
EB: pff, cute!  
CT: D --> I  
CT: D --> I’m   
CT: D --> I’m n  
CT:   
CT: D --> Okay  
EB: wait, do you not like being called cute?  
CT: D --> What  
CT: D --> No, it  
CT: D --> It’s just that it has  
CT: D --> Uhm  
CT: D --> Never  
CT: D --> Happened before  
EB: well i meant it in a friendly human way, if that helps.  
EB: i call all my friends cute!  
CT: D --> Oh  
CT: D --> I   
CT: D --> I suppose that helps a little bit  
CT: D --> ...  
CT: D --> If we were to continue the hobbies conversation  
CT: D --> Another one of mine is attempting to hone my e%trodinary STRENGTH  
EB: oh!!  
EB: my dad once wanted me to lift a safe. for a note of all things!  
EB: i was finally able to lift it over my head without any wind powers once we got here.  
CT: D --> That is cute  
CT: D --> I once leant on a wall and broke the entire wall  
EB: holy fuck.  
CT: D --> It was an a%ident  
EB: wait  
EB: wait is that why theres a giant hole in the wall of the local art gallery?  
CT: D --> _IT WAS AN A%IDENT_  
EB: oh my god.  
EB: maybe instead of trying to control your strength, maybe you should try controlling your Void powers?  
EB: it might help solve future wall breaking issues.  
CT: D --> Yes but  
CT: D --> Here’s the problem with that:  
CT: D --> Clipping  
EB: Cl... ipping?  
CT: D --> You know the video game company  
CT: D --> Troll Bethesda   
EB: the one infamous for its glitches?  
CT: D --> Yes  
CT: D --> Imagine that  
CT: D --> But in real life  
EB: thats a little scary, actually.  
CT: D --> I have clipped through the f100r once while attempting to use my... uh, ‘Voidy Thing’  
CT: D --> Ro%y had to pull me out  
CT: D --> It was a wholly embarrassing e%perience  
CT: D --> I never want to do it again  
EB: damn :(  
EB: that sucks.  
EB: i think you should still give it a go though, maybe honing them will avoid the “clipping” issues!  
CT: D --> Maybe  
CT: D --> But I don’t know if it will happen again  
CT: D --> I’m a little scared   
CT: D --> But  
CT: D --> Maybe if  
CT: D --> Well, if I never try, I’ll never get the hang of it  
CT: D --> You know what  
CT: D --> I am going to try it right now  
EB: good luck!!  
CT: D --> Thank you, I will need it

centaursTesticle [CT] is now idle!

EB: ... equius are you ok? you havent messaged back for 10 minutes.  
EB: equius???

centaursTesticle [CT] is no longer idle!

CT: Here I am  
CT: On my mobile, now  
EB: oh thank god, youre ok  
CT: “Ok” is a stretch  
CT: On the bright-side I was able to somehow use the Void to grab my mobile from its previous location  
EB: what??  
EB: what happened???  
CT: Put it this way  
CT: I am currently inside the f100r  
EB: oh my god.  
CT: And I am missing an arm, I did not notice that  
EB: _WHAT????!_  
CT: Do not worry it is still there  
CT: But it is just  
CT: Missing from view  
CT: Anyway, I am very stuck  
CT: Very, very stuck  
CT: One c001d say I am  
CT: F100r Trapped...?  
CT: Anyway  
CT: I have not been doing my Bow and Arrow, because this is a Very Serious Situation  
CT: Plus typing one handed and making sure words are spelt right is very hard  
EB: i  
EB: do you want me to get some help??  
CT: No, I can handle this  
EB: i dont think you can.  
EB: not on your own, anyway.  
CT: No, I need to do this on my own  
CT: Otherwise I will never figure these things out  
EB: im going to come over.  
CT: Why  
CT: You can’t e%actly help  
CT: Plus, I’m 100% sure I 100k both terrible and terrifying  
CT: Stuck in the f100r of my respiteblock without an arm in view  
CT: I don’t even know where my legs are  
CT: The Void, probably  
CT: John?  
CT: ... John is that you knocking  
EB: yes.  
CT: Oh  
CT: Pardon my language but  
CT: Balls  
CT: How am I supposed to let you in  
EB: just like, open a window, or something.  
CT: What  
EB: ill just become the wind  
EB: its surprisingly easy.  
CT: Well  
CT: Okay  
CT: If you say so  
CT: Give me a moment or so to find a window I can open  
CT: Fhfjsk  
CT: Śđôęæč  
EB: equius are you leaning on your phone?  
EB: oh!  
CT: Do you see that?  
EB: yep!   
EB: im coming in now!   
CT:  
CT: Wait  
CT: Why are you coming in, anyway?  
EB: moral support, of course!  
EB: inheriting your aspect is kind of hard!  
CT: Oh  
CT: Well you’re certainly not wrong, this is very difficult  
CT: Oh, hey  
CT: My arm is back  
CT: Good timing  
EB: :p  
EB: see ya then!!   
CT: Yes   
CT: See you

\-- ectoBiologist [EB] ceased pestering centaursTesticle [CT]! --

**Author's Note:**

> I swear to god I have so many god damn fics to write and I fucking decide on writing _this bullshit_ instead. 
> 
> I am so sorry to the people who follow my works for my long fics, I swear to god I will update them soonish. Hopefully. As soon as I get some ideas for the ne%t chapters of them. 
> 
> Apologies. 
> 
> Either way, I enjoyed writing it, so I hope you enjoy reading it!!! (May or may not get more chapters depending on honestly my mood.)


End file.
